Friday, January 23, 2009

Dear Nigerians,

Stop sending me e-mails. I'm serious. I don't care how much money your dead rich relatives left you. I'm not giving you my bank account number. Go ahead, cry. CRY YOU LITTLE BABIES.

Take a page out of the Somalians' book. They've brought sea piracy back in the 21st century, which we can all agree is awesome. They don't attempt to trick easily-confused middle aged yuppies on the internet, but rather, board ships and plunder cargo. They slit throats. Have you ever slitten a throat? No, didn't think so. Have you ever fired a harpoon into the side of a barge, then climbed across the cable onto a ship and started hacking people's limbs off?


You'll never be that cool. You spend all your time fabricating stories that involve 15,000,000 dollars, a prince dying, and you needing to flee the country due to communism/terrorists/the plague/cicadas. You spend all day on your stolen computer (that you took from a government office during a period of unrest) answering e-mails, hoping that you can convince some poor sap that you're legitimate. You have no honor, you heathens.

If you do not cease your malign activity at once, we cut off your supply of porn. Your country will then promptly fall slide into anarchy.

- Calicolyst


Wonder Man said...

It's the most silliest scam I've seen in a while

Steve Morozumi said...

this has been going on for awhile. i still get spammed by the Nigerian boob letters you speak of. it's beyond annoying!

i don't even think they're Nigerians.

-Steve @ fluxlife

Maggie Monroe said...

dude you don't even know how many of these things i've gotten. sigh.

NoooEeee said...

you should check out, its a website dedicated to messing with these Nigerian scammers. Some of them are pretty hilarious.

Adam said...

I am surprised you didn't find this article on Yahoo! News.

Nigerian's are stupid!

rangr said...

Poor Nigerian. He/she has so much oil that his country it can be called his/her black death. Yet, he/she has to send all those scam mails to get his money.

Karen said...

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Take care!

Fred said...

This type of scam is known in the hacking world as Social Engineering. I wouldn't be surprised if they are Chinese not Nigerian. lol You could find some articles on security web sites about it. I can't think of any atm.

PinkPanthress said...

Wait.. so this means, I was not supposed to hand them my Account Info & #??? *whoops*

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